Epilogue

You would think that after playing all day on Tuesday (and losing), I would just curl up in a ball and sleep all day Wednesday.

I thought about doing just that, but instead, I woke up paradoxically refreshed and ready to seize the day. I slept better on Tuesday night than I have in several days. It was almost like (a) a great burden had been lifted from my psyche; and (b) I had exercised myself (mentally) into a state of exhaustion that only a good night of sleep could correct.

Whatever caused this, I showered up early and started looking at poker tournaments to play that day. To my surprise, there was a $250 tournament for seniors only at the WSOP at 8:00 a.m.  (I guess this fits into the stereotype of seniors not sleeping late.)

It was 7:50 when I saw this, so I dressed quickly (hoodie, jeans, sneakers) and raced over to the WSOP registration to enter the tournament.

My streak of non-premium hands continued all day - no large pairs, no straights, no flushes - but when my pair of nines met up with another pair of nines on the board, I was off to the races. The tournament took all day - I wolfed down a cheeseburger at 1:00 for lunch in lieu of breakfast and lunch - but I finished in the money at 29th place out of 265 players and made $441 dollars.  (This is a pretty lousy hourly rate, but we don't do this for the money.)

After that, I went to an ATM to get some money to enter Friday's Lucky 7's WSOP tournament ($777 entry and a guaranteed first prize of $777,777), but found out that it would cost me $56 to withdraw $1000. As one of the cheapest men alive, I refused to pay that kind of exorbitant fee to access my own hard-earned money, so I looked for a Bank of America ATM on the Strip where I could make a withdrawal with no fees.

It turns out the closest BOA ATM was on the fourth floor of the M&Ms store near the MGM Grand. So, dressed for the cold poker rooms (they keep those rooms at something like 68 degrees), I walked the mile or so down the strip to get the money.

It was quite the walk. At one point, you have to take an overpass escalator up and then down and then up a stairwell and down an escalator to continue down the Strip. There are street shows with rappers, singers, showgirls, Disney characters, and two shirtless muscle guys in cowboy hats and whips (they had just finished, so I didn't see what they did exactly with those whips).

And the people you pass! It is quite the variety: obviously honeymooning couples, skeevy men and women with minimum clothing, families with babies in strollers, douchebag bros recounting their gambling losses and romantic triumphs. The one thing that really stood out for me was the number of women wearing exposed bras under diaphanous tops, exposing serious cleavage. It seemed to be a throwback to Madonna's "Desperately Seeking Susan" period. 

I was not offended.

So I got to the M&M store, which is jammed with four floors of candy-coated chocolate. (I did wonder as I was going up the escalators what would happen if Vegas had an electricity black out for a day or two - that store would be the equivalent of the bag of M&Ms you walk around with all day in your pants pocket, just a big mush of melted chocolate and candy shards.)

When I tried to access my business account - the money I've made from doing some gentleman lawyering on the side while retired - the ATM declined my request, stating that my card had been the subject of unusual use. I suppose this might be a thing - one partner in a business emptying out the savings account to manage his degenerate gambling habit - so I appreciated the security, but it was still super-annoying.

I then tried my personal family account and for some reason, it was okay with me getting the money I requested. (Banks must be okay with protecting businesses from embezzlement, but they aren't going to get in the middle of estranged spouses making preemptive attacks on the joint checking account.)

On the way back, I stopped at Planet Hollywood and played some pai gow, and went on quite a run. I then played one hand of blackjack and won and then cashed out. For the week, I am now only down $106 (not including my Main Event buy-in, which wasn't my money anyway).

Of the seven guys who started, I'm the only one out. Wojo, Mike, Greg, and Marcus all bagged and will be playing on Friday. John L. plays today, and John C. has decided to skip Day 1 and start with his 60,000 in chips on Day 2 (I should have done that). As the weak link this year, I can only stand by and cheer these guys on to poker immortality.

My wife Lisa arrives today, so I am moving to the Bellagio and will be the tour guide for her and her friends. Not a bad consolation prize!

That's it for me on this blog. To sum up:

*  You can't win if you don't get cards.

*  I haven't decided whether I will do this again next year, or just have fun playing the Seniors and Super Seniors tournaments next year. That week is always much less pressure and much more socializing with my friends, and the tournaments don't last eleven days.

*  Thanks to all of you for your kind words in the wake of my loss. I appreciate your friendship more than you can know.